I have been in quite a reflective mode over the past few weeks, evaluating my life, relationships, motivations and decisions. I have come to the conclusion that I deserve better and so do you!
You deserve better than being with someone who thinks they’re awesome but treats you as less than:
Fuck that! Forget that twonk. That is not a relationship. Relationships are meant to be equal partnerships. If someone doesn’t recognise your value and your level of awesomeness you need to just get rid. They are just a human like you, did they cure HIV? Did they save the world from an asteroid? No, they are a living, breathing organism just like everyone else and they certainly don’t deserve your attention or affection if they think they are better than you are.
Never put someone on a higher pedestal than your own.
Do you talk or thinking badly of yourself? Do you put yourself down to make someone else feel better? Cut that shit out right now! Every negative thought or action against yourself chips away at your self esteem, which is your own personal coat of armour against the world. What will eventually happen is that your armour will become porous, leave you vulnerable and ultimately negative people and situations will get in and cause more damage. If someone else said the things to you, that you say to yourself, you would (hopefully) kick their ass to the kerb. So stop being so friggin nasty to yourself, like right now!
You deserve more than being someones dirty little secret.
Ok this clearly doesn’t apply to a polygamous situation. You good folks carry on doing your good thing. Now for you monogamous folks. You deserve more than to be someones bit on the side. Full stop, end of sentence. You deserve to be someones priority not someone’s part time hobby. Sure they might fill you with all of the good stuff, kind words, affection, maybe gifts, hell they may even use the L word, but if their actions do not reflect their words then what are you doing to yourself? You deserve someone who is as devoted to you as you are to them. You don’t need to be scratching around for the dregs of a relationship. Sure they may be incredible and everything you had hoped for but is it worth it if you are their sideline?
You deserve better than constantly chasing someone.
Seriously, this isn’t a hunter, gatherer situation. You are not gonna win a prize for effort and dedication. How long can you keep running for? It’s like signing up to a marathon with no defined end. It’s exhausting! Eventually you are going to have nothing left to give, not even to yourself. Nobody is that special! Plus if they can’t see you for the incredible person you are then why are you wasting your time! Put that energy into finding someone who thinks you’re something.
You deserve better than an excuse filled relationship
It doesn’t matter if it’s your excuses or theirs. Stop lying to yourself and/ or others so that you can make way for a relationship with substance. Deep down you know it too, when you are making excuses for them or their behaviour, all is not as it seems. All those fibs take too much time and effort. Aint nobody got time for that!
You deserve better than waiting around for someone to make up their mind about you.
Let me tell you from personal experience – waiting around is degrading and soul destroying. That kind of decision doesn’t take that much friggin time. Do you want me or not? It’s that simple! If there is a grey area of maybe that makes you unsure then kindly fuck off and leave me be. You deserve more than someone who sees you are a grey area or a maybe. Plus a helluva lot more than being someones option till someone better comes along! To continue to wait around for someone who hasn’t frickin chosen you, is to keep choosing not to be chosen. It’s like saying “I’m giving you a chance to make a different choice because I don’t like the choice you’ve made. Again.” Choose you, before you lose you.
You deserve better than going back to a relationship that has broken for all the right reasons.
Don’t undo the hard work and thought you have put into what was actually a good decision. You don’t need someone to make you the exception for it to be ‘love’ – stop trying to get love out of unlikely and broken places. Trust your instincts and stop looking back.
You deserve better than lies and abuse.
No! Just no! All the no! If you don’t have honesty, what have you got? Seriously now! If another human doesn’t even have the respect for you to tell you the truth then why are you wasting your time! As for abuse, there is no excuse. No excuses, no second chances. Fuck that! Love should never hurt in any way!
You deserve better than this!
Chances are if you are reading this the question is already in your head. I’m not suggesting that you flippantly throw away your relationships. What I am saying is that you need to remember your own worth! You are worth so much, if only you would realise it! I’m not saying that you should be worshiped and adored 24/7 – hey it’d be nice but we have real lives to get on with. You do deserve honesty, respect, dignity and equality. Those are things you cannot comprimise! Never, ever settle for anything less than what you deserve!
Bottom line: A good relationship should ruin your lipstick, not your mascara!